Breanna Has Arrived

Oh my gosh! Did this really happen? Did I really have a child? Was I really pregnant to begin with? I feel like I'm in this dream state and I want someone to pinch me. I'm so in love w/ my husband and we're so awwed by our daughter, Breanna Grace Miller. She was a big one. Oh my gosh. I'm glad that I elected to have a C-Section b/c there is no way she'd be able to fit through my pelvis. SHe was a wopping 10 pounds and 7 ounces -- also 21 inches long. She was a strong one too.

I don't know how to feel but I feel so weird and I think it's the hormones and I think it's the drugs at the same time. I don't like feeling whoozy and I'm only taking Ibuprofin. Gosh. I'm in pain.

I'm not sure what to write right now.

Today is the day!

Oh my gosh! Did this really happen? Did I really have a child? Was I really pregnant to begin with? I feel like I'm in this dream state and I want someone to pinch me. I'm so in love w/ my husband and we're so awwed by our daughter, Breanna Grace Miller. She was a big one. Oh my gosh. I'm glad that I elected to have a C-Section b/c there is no way she'd be able to fit through my pelvis. SHe was a wopping 10 pounds and 7 ounces -- also 21 inches long. She was a strong one too.

I don't know how to feel but I feel so weird and I think it's the hormones and I think it's the drugs at the same time. I don't like feeling whoozy and I'm only taking Ibuprofin. Gosh. I'm in pain.

I'm not sure what to write right now.

Tomorrow is the day!!

Thank you ladies for all the support in my decision to have this Cesarean Delivery. I've meddled over the process weeks before just in case it may have to happen and the time has come (actually tomorrow May 3rd is the day). I was reluctant at first thought to have this procedure happen, but as my baby is getting riskily larger it seems it's the best decision for the both of us. I rather sacrifice a small section of my body than to harm my child in the delivery process. I'll be with highly qualified doctors and med staff.

Sheesh. The pain we women go through to have our babies =)

Effacement: 80% -- still
Dilation: 2cm -- still
Weight: 200 lbs -- oh my gosh!! (50 lbs gained since prepregnancy)
Fundus Height: 43 inches
Baby's Estimated Weight: 9.5 lbs

She's going to be a big baby!!

Reflections: A New Leaf, A New Life...Tomorrow

It's hard to believe that tomorrow my life is going to be different. We'll have a baby in our lives and I'll be recovering from some major abdominal pain. These are two big deals. I feel like I'm just undergoing a hazy dream state but this is actually the real deal:

David and I are bringing our baby Breanna into this world -- and it's so hard to believe!

I'm not sure if I'm in a state of shock, awe, nervousness, excitement, or whatever. I've lived my entire life without someone depending on me and tomorrow everything is going to change. I'm sure David is as "blah" about this as I am, but he's more on the excited state. Yesterday, he bought a whole bunch of pink Candy Cigars labeled "It's A Girl" and started handing them out today -- even to strangers! =) I'm glad he's this joyous so he could balance me out from these weird mix of emotions. David, my cuddly crutch.

Scheduled Cesarean

Here's the update w/ my pregnancy, Wednesday (May 3nd) I have a C-Section scheduled. The docs and med staff highly urge that this C-Section happen this week b/c I'm about 41 weeks pregnant with a LARGE baby at high risk for Shoulder Dystocia (getting stuck at the shoulders), and I'd be risking my baby's health if I let her keep growing past 42 weeks.

When I had my 3rd ultrasound at 39 weeks to measure her body, her abdominal area and shoulders displayed the size of a 41 week old fetus. Now that I'm 41 weeks, she obviously has grown and is probably displaying the body size of a 43 (possibly 44 week old) fetus. To have a vaginal delivery would definitely mean they'd have to (1) break her collarbone, (2) fold her shoulder over, (3) and finally pull her out -- I would truly feel so GUILTY for having to put her through this additional trauma as the delivery process is already a traumatizing event for the baby already. Gosh.

I'm now glad to submit myself to the knife without spontaneous labor b/c I just learned that the C-Section recovery time is better and possibly faster than if I were to go through hours of labor without any progress since my baby is superwoman large =)

So my next assigment: prep for this cesarean delivery

Miserable

My body felt so miserable yesterday (April 30th) from morning to night. I was experiencing all at once tension headaches, fatigue, achy bones, swollen feet. I had no appetite. I felt ill, lonely, and depressed. When will this pregnancy move on to the next stage of delivery? I really desire spontaneous delivery to happen first before submitting myself to the knife. I'm not yet tempted to take in castor oil.

David and my parents are edgy and probably stressed out from all the calls we get over and over -- "is she born yet?" It's getting a little tiring waiting for Breanna to come out. Sometimes I wonder if she even knows where the exit is.

Head Spinner

I am feeling so weak and fatigued. I must have not eaten or drank enough today. I went to the gym and sat down for a bit then dozed off when I should have continued walking. Sometimes I feel like an inspiration to the gym rats since I turn so many heads as I'm overdue, very large, and still gym-ing it!

She may just be a May Baby, maybe

I thought I was going to have the baby today (April 28th) b/c I was having one long, super-strong contraction that lasted for about 15 minutes -- it seems. It was after I took a stroll through the neighborhood just to get my blood pumping after napping. From a scale of 1-10 (1 being "a walk in the park") I was feeling a 10. It was as though someone had shot me on the belly and all I could feel was pain.

False alarm. I'm still pregnant w/ a pain at 2 as I type this.

She may just be a May Baby, maybe.

Daddy On Edge and the "?" of Induction

I am so glad that David has plenty of friends to sort out his emotions especially w/ this new responsibility of being a daddy. He tends not to share his true emotions to me right away -- either that or I don't take him seriously usually b/c he's a comedian at heart. Poor guy -- he cries wolf many times and I tend not to listen when I should.

One thing I'm concerned about is that he might get into a car accident on the way to the hospital when it's time. He's already edgy from people calling him non-stop about my progress. He doesn't have one of those phones that distinguishes my call from the rest of the world. Poor thing -- I'm the one to physically and painfully bear our child while he's the one going through the agonizing fretfulness.

So about Breanna -- I'm told that if I just can't take the wait any longer then I could induce her. This brings up two obvious questions: (1) when? or (2) should I wait for God's timing? I choose the latter except when her overstay might pose a health problem on either of us. I've made up my mind to have a C-Section after a few hours of painful labor. My big baby is going to be the cutest big baby in the neighborhood!

BTW -- all this daily walking is actually making me feel very good and I notice that I don't hobble like a pregnant lady as much. Go MEEH! =) I guess I'm a few steps closer to training for a half-marathon after all -- I thought I was so out of shape. yay!

Good Progression

OK -- so she didn't arrive on her estimated due date either. Oh well -- she's not even born yet she's testing my patience =)

I have, however, been feeling more signs of progression. I feel as if I've gained 100 lbs in the past two days! I'm also getting PMS symptoms such as a dull lower back ache, crampiness in the lower abdominal area, thick blood-streaked mucous that looks like snot and a bloody smell in my underwear, and most obvious to those around me: irritability.

Also, I think she found a new spot in my abdomen to stretch out as she's being cramped -- my stomach! I easily get heartburn at the slightest decline of my body. Plus, I could feel her pushing up against the bottom part of my sternum. It seems like she really is trying to get comfy in there. I tried doing some "bumpy" exercises tonight to expediate labor -- step aerobics, walking, soft jumping, some jogging -- anything to make her want to "jiggle" out of there. Per midwife, it's safe.

My contractions are still happening regularly and painlessly, yet at the same time are becoming a bit more noticeable. She moves around more than 10 times in a 20 minute period still -- good sign of activity.

Wednesday night assignment: WALK MORE, ACCUPRESSURE, RED RASPBERRY LEAF TEA

The Annoying Wait

Allright. So Breanna didn't arrive yesterday nor last night. Argh!!

Anyways I went to my weekly prenatal visit (and hopefully the last one) and got an internal exam. My cervix has come forward more (which is a good change from last week). However, it still is 2cm dilated and needs to be effaced more. But the exciting news is that this time, my midwife was able to insert her finger through the cervix and feel the bag of waters and my baby girl's head -- WOW! This means that I'm ultra close to delivery and it may possibly be tonight -- I hope. Come on Breanna!!

I allowed her to strip my membranes for longer than 30 seconds -- last time I didn't allow it to last more than 5 seconds. Gosh this procedure is so annoying! Basically, stripping the membranes means to separate the bag of waters from the cervix. It is not intended to break the water bag, however, it may. It's a way to sort of "get things going" in regards to labor and is supposed to stimulate production of prostiglandins in the cervix and bring on contractions.

We're guessing that she'll be born on or before Thursday 4/27/06, especially after all these labor inducing mechanisms happening.

The Annoying Wait

Stage 1 :: Early Labor

I went to the non-stress test today and happily watched my contractions come regularly almost every 5 to 7 minutes. They're still not hurting like I'm expecting. Breanna seems to react well to these contractions too. However, even though I'm having regular contractions, pelvic pressure, knife-like pain in the cervical area, lower back pain, etc -- the techs and doc sent me home yet, but urged that I stay near to the hospital for a possible return tonight. I'm classified as being at Stage One and in early labor. They cautioned me to look for my bag of waters breaking, extremely bloody show, and stronger contractions -- and estimated that it probably shouldn't take longer than 3 days to deliver this big baby.

Tomorrow, I have another prenatal appointment w/ my midwife in Mira Mesa. She'll be giving me an update on my cervical progress. Last week it was 2cm dilated, 80% effaced, and positioned still up there. Hopefully tomorrow or tonight it'll be 4-10 cm dilated, 100% effaced, and brought forward.

I've regained patience now that delivery is only hours away.

Tonight's assignment: WALK WALK WALK

Labor?

It was 1:00AM on a Monday morning when I woke up for my usual bathroom routine. While on my way back to bed I decided to time the frequency and duration of these contractions I've been getting for the past few hours.

First contraction -- about 60 seconds -- then tick tick tick I hear the clock as my uterus relaxes. Second contraction -- a little over 60 seconds -- then tick tick tick I hear the clock again as my uterus relaxes. I repeated these counts until 2:00AM. I had more than 6 or 7 contractions in a one hour period that lasts about 60 seconds.

According to the books, this is true labor. Plus I've been getting other symptoms in the past few hours. My lower abdominal area seems to be really tightened and heavy as I either walk around or switch sleeping positions from leaning from left side or right side. As I type, I'm still getting contractions. The strange thing is that I'm expecting contractions to hurt like those charlie horses I get while walking. These contractions don't hurt -- and according to the books, some people don't notice these contractions. I think I'm one of them.

Other symptoms I'm feeling are mild diarrhea and mild lower back pain.

If Breanna is going to be born today I'll be happy. Plus, the date is easy to remember. 4/24/06 -- four goes into twenty-four six times -- hehe. If today is the day, she is surprisingly going to arrive very close to her EDD -- 4/25/06! Breanna, you seem to be very punctual =)

Breanna has her usual non-stress test today (as she has been having them every Monday and Thursday) and I wonder how she'll be behaving w/ all these contractions -- my body doesn't have contractions usually when we go through these tests together. Hopefully the technicians will tell me that I have to head over to the labor & delivery room to have Breanna at that hour -- at least I'll be in the hospital than 45 mins up in Escondido. I'll just have to call a few people to hang out w/ me as I go through these labor pains.

It won't be long Breanna -- you're going to meet your parents and the rest of the family who've been eagerly waiting for you. I'm praying that God and his angels intervene as I attempt to have a vaginal delivery after all this scare about you being so large and possibly incapable of safely making it through my pelvis. Right now I have confidence -- I hope it remains throughout.

Contractions

I wonder why walking gives me contractions. I don't even think they're labor contractions anymore. I just think that I get them b/c those muscles haven't been worked out in these 9 months and that any kind of use causes these "charlie horse" cramps. I'm feeling impatient now and want her to arrive.

I have a feeling that she doesn't want to arrive until after the April 25th due date. I've learned that only 5% of babies arrive on the EDD while the majority arrive 1 or 2 weeks after. My mom thinks she'll be a May baby -- and if she is then definitely want a C-Section. She's already a large one.

WEIGHT: 194 LBS
BELLY-H: 47-1/4"
BELLY-V: 22-1/2"
WAIST: 41-3/4"
BOOBS-H: 39"
BOOBS-V: 14-1/2"

Uncomfortable

It's April 18th and according to my internal exam my cervix has come down a little (but is still high up there a bit), about 2 cm dilated and about 80% effaced. So what does this mean?

I'm already in labor -- Early Labor . . .

but I still have to wait until I'm about 4-5 cm dilated to get admitted to the hospital. I've been having mild (and bothersome) contractions during sleeping hours last night (or early morning), and then they became a bit more painful when I walked around the neighborhood for about a mile when I was really awake. They sort of feel like a muscle cramp or "charlie horse" that I get when exercising -- but it felt much stronger and tightened my entire abdominal area. I continued walking through the pain and breathed deeply like I would when I get a charlie horse, but it didn't go away until a few minutes after I stopped walking.

I thought it was funny when my midwife encouraged David and I to "go home and have fun" -- in other words, have David help me naturally induce labor. How fun!

Possible Induction of Labor

It's April 18th and according to my internal exam my cervix has come down a little (but is still high up there a bit), about 2 cm dilated and about 80% effaced. So what does this mean?

I'm already in labor -- Early Labor . . .

but I still have to wait until I'm about 4-5 cm dilated to get admitted to the hospital. I've been having mild (and bothersome) contractions during sleeping hours last night (or early morning), and then they became a bit more painful when I walked around the neighborhood for about a mile when I was really awake. They sort of feel like a muscle cramp or "charlie horse" that I get when exercising -- but it felt much stronger and tightened my entire abdominal area. I continued walking through the pain and breathed deeply like I would when I get a charlie horse, but it didn't go away until a few minutes after I stopped walking.

I thought it was funny when my midwife encouraged David and I to "go home and have fun" -- in other words, have David help me naturally induce labor. How fun!