Breathless w/ Swollen Feet

David and I were out and about the entire day today! In order -- we went to church at Emmanual Faith, had lunch w/ our new friends at Chili's ($30), had an argument over David saying the word "ASS" loudly near kids under 10, checked out the Swap Meet near to our house for about 30 minutes, drove down to North County Fair to buy sunglasses but got sucked into the holiday shopping spirit and spent 3-1/2 hours walking around the mall impulsively buying things we knew we couldn't afford now but needed soon (including maternity clothes, clothes for David, and a Specialty Christmas CD from Brookstone that you couldn't find anywhere else).

Now I'm here typing at home, and have been home for the past 3 hours chatting w/ a good friend (Hi Alba!), preparing & eating dinner, spending more quality time w/ David relaxing & enjoying each other's company.

I'm so breathless, my heart rate is almost as fast as my baby's & my feet are swollen from those 4 hours of walking/standing today! I wonder if I'm unhealthy for having such a rapid heart rate. I haven't been getting much exercise and have been eating much more than 2 servings per meal -- I think.

It Did What?

Okay, I'm going to get really personal here -- and I don' t mind at all being T.M.I. b/c it's my journal anyway. And who knows which anonymous readers will benefit from it?

Alrighty, here goes...

Last night David and I did "the something" for many, many minutes (*a-hem*--*blush*). Immediately afterwards, about 2-3 inches above my pubic bone I felt something inside me kinda swell up the size of a dinner roll. I could also feel it w/ my hand lightly brushing over that area kinda like how I would examine my breast for cancer. That "dinner roll" could be felt from the outside! It was weird. I wonder if that was my baby freaking out and pressing against my skin (away from the action -- hehehe) or if the placenta dropped or something unknown and freaky. Well, I'm fine now and am not worried. I just thought that was really unusual and strange. I read many articles that it's perfectly fine to do "the something" w/ your honey and not harm the baby.

Verge of Change?

David just had an interview today w/ a very prosperous company, SAIC. He'd be working as a technical writer for this company and even if it's far from home, he said that many people traveler farther from where we live to get there. I hope he gets the job b/c it'll pay much better than where he is currently. Plus, it'll look really good on his resume to be a part of this place. With this added income, I could hopefully be able to stay home and watch the baby or work part-time. We'll see.

I smell weird! My area down there gives off an interesting odor -- of Hawaiian Bread. I eat the right foods and shower every day. I wonder what's going on down there?

I'm so glad that my appetite is back again. For a while I wasn't eating enough due to nausea, but now I can seem to eat a lot more food -- but simple food. It seems every morning and evening when I get home I want to eat 3 bowls of cereal, 2 fists full of green grapes, bread and sometimes pork or beef. Right now I'm craving breakfast sausage links and rice. I hope I don't get too, too fat when the baby is out. I also wonder how soon I could train for a half-marathon after birth?

Gasoline

Last night David and I had a rough time sleeping. Late in the afternoon, he poured a little gasoline (that should go into our lawn mower) into an ant hole nestled near to our bedroom window. The hours following that time, fume spread throughout the backyard and into the house -- especially into our bedroom. Even though the window had been closed the entire time, the fumes somehow found a way to get in.

That night, concerned about the health of our baby and ourselves, we slept in the extra bedroom. We didn't sleep well though. We're so used to having our own luxurious space on our Cal. King & very comfy mattress -- and sacrificed that for an ultra-sturdy full size bed which we had to spin in place to get a comfy position. Plus, we were anxious that the fumes might not go away all night and might eventually seep into our supposed safe-haven.

David learned his lesson: safety includes respiratory health, too -- not just preventative cuts/bruises, etc.

Family Fun Fun

It was pretty neat being w/ the family yesterday. My cousin was having a baby shower and I was getting some ideas on how to do my baby's shower. It was the first time for me to see my family after I was pregnant and they were so excited to see me "bulging" at 4 months. An interesting thing is that my cousin's future sister-in-law is 4 months pregnant too and her due date is just days before mine. It'll be really interesting if we had our kids the same day. I was glad that she was as large as I b/c I didn't want to appear too fat as a 4 month-pregnant lady.

But, my gosh, I was so attracted to that barbeque steak-kabob and white rice! I had 3 servings of that stuff...and just thinking about it right now makes me want to eat more of it! I wished I had taken some home. They had so much food there in the beginning of the party, but by night when everyone had a round of food, there was none left. Poor guests. Those who missed out on that barbeque really missed out on something delicious. Around 7 o'clock my cousin had to order 4 boxes of pizza b/c the food was running out.

My grandma was so cute. She was so excited to see me and that I'm pregnant w/ her great-grandchild. Actually, both me and my cousin Janette will be giving her great-grandchildren the same year. Double happiness to grandma Rebing! What was so cute about her was when she told me to stop pinching my blubber b/c she thought I could be pinching her great-grandbaby inside. I missed my family. I love them lots. Grandma Rebing is my only living grandma and she was my primary care taker growing up b/c my mom and dad were busy working. It's great to see here still alive.

Exercise

I went jogging today after work. I felt pretty gross having eaten so many bad foods throughout the week: candy, chocolate, oily fries, extra calories my body doesn't need. I jogged/walked for 2 miles and it felt comfy now that I have a sports bra to push by heavy boobs up against me. There were many times in the weeks prior to today that I tried to jog, but when I did my boobs bounced around. So I had to hold them up w/ my arms while jogging, but wasn't comfortable and felt awkward when neighbor saw me holding this private area. So I got a sports bra for my sensitive-to-gravity boobies.

I wonder what would happen to the baby if I train for a half-marathon? I had a really great time preparing for the America's Finest City 1/2 Marathon in August 2003. I was so proud to get a medal for making it before the 3 hour cut-off. If I got a high running, maybe my baby might also especially w/ all that extra oxygen -- but the books say to not jog for longer than 2 miles. Why?

Kicks For Kicks

I could feel the baby's movement now. My doctor said that it might be a little early to tell but I told her that I could feel something like muscle spasms or twitches in that region below my naval. She was startled and said that usually first time mommies don't feel anything yet b/c they pass up these movements as though they were hunger pangs, a bubble bursting, or what I thought I felt -- muscle spasms/twitches. It's so cool! I hope that David would be able to catch our baby kicking when I feel him/her. Usually David falls flat on the floor, pretending that the baby kicked so hard through my skin. Funny guy. I've actually have been feeling these movements for at least two weeks but haven't recorded it yet.

Other things I've noticed for a while that I haven't recorded was a dark line forming down the middle of my abdomen. I was so excited to even see a line back when I noticed it. I think they call it "Linea Negra" -- black line. Sometimes I like being pregnant. Other times its a little rough and tough. The rougher part of being pregnant is feeling like a second class citizen in the workplace b/c I want to do so much more for the company but they want to keep me from having too many responsibilities -- as if they don't trust me =(. I hope I'll stil have a work life when the baby is born.

Thoughts

Today seemed like an ordinary day of routine. I think I'm getting used to this temporary lifestyle of a pregnant mama. Wake up next to husband (ahh) -- cook something small for breakfast -- get ready for work -- beat street traffic to get to work -- work -- pee -- work -- hydrate -- snack on cereal -- work -- lunch -- pee -- avoid comatose after lunch -- pee -- work -- bear tension headache -- work -- go home. Even though routine can be boring, I at least have fulfillment w/ my job. I love the people I work with and am unsure of how things will go after I give our baby birth. Will I return? Will I work part-time? Will my company hire a babysitter for me and 2 new mamas of the company?

So many decisions and I want to do what's best for me and my new family. I rather stay home and take care of our baby than to work work work.

I missed out having a relationship w/ my parents growing up b/c they both had to work to support the family. I was left w/ caretakers. We were so poor at the start. Now I conciously have to force myself to love my parents b/c they are my parents. It's hard to build a foundation of affection when there was little to begin w/. The more powerful memories I had as a child were negative from unfair discipline -- or discipline w/o a cause which can easily be mistaken for abuse in our society's now-PC world. Sometimes I feel adopted...and I don't want my kids to turn out emotionally neglected like me. I need to be home most of the time so they could have a mom. Well -- enough of this bitter soapbox.

Yesterday, we heard the baby's heartbeat again, but this time it was slightly slower than the first time we heard it from the doptone. Maybe as the baby gets larger, the heart is supposed to beat slower. That was a fun day. I also was excused from paying that large bill, which was accidentally sent to me instead of the insurance company -- phew!! I also got a whole bunch of shots in one arm: flu shot, tb shot, and blood drawn for amniocentisis (sp?). Right now my left arm is sore from one of those needles. She said that word again: "terminate". Even if the test says my baby has problems I can't trust it b/c it's 85% accurate -- not 99% or higher. I'm already attached to his/her heartbeat. God wants my baby to live.

WEIGHT: 156 LBS
BELLY-H: 36-3/4"
BELLY-V: 14-1/2"
WAIST: 33-1/4"
BOOBS-H: 36-3/4"
BOOBS-V: 13"

Headache Again?

Okay, so in a previous journal entry I mentioned that a little exercise would do the trick in taking care of a tension headache. But what if I was at work and I don't have that kind of time to exercise during my break or lunch? I have to eat during that time and make sure that my blood sugar does drop or else I'll vomit. I learned that pattern the hard way -- don't eat, then body vomits.

Today was a rough day at work. I had a headache from the morning until I took Tylenol. I knew it was safe to take Tylenol, but some of my coworkers were concerned that I might harm the baby taking the Extra-Strength type. So just to ease my worries and theirs, I called the clinic to see if it would be alright to take even the Extra-Strength kind, and I already knew the answer but just wanted to hear it from the clinic themselves -- it's okay.

So there.

Headache eased -- work accomplished -- and off to the doctor I go tomorrow. My appointment is at 11:30am but I need to be there at 11:10. I'm a little excited and then again upset that they sent me a huge bill for the initial lab tests I've taken for blood type, HIV, cervix tests, etc. Now why did they send it to my home?

Acid Reflux/Heartburn??

Today was a particularly strange day for my body. Around 7AM I had a good size breakfast. 1 hour later at work I had a feeling of hunger, but am not really sure. So I went to the closest food place and got me a medium-size salad and finished most of it. Then 3 hours afterward I was feeling hungry again. By the end of the day, I could feel my body feeling icky from all the stuff I was feeding myself:

2 pcs of candy (I gave in to the Post-Halloween trick-o-eating fest in the office)
2 pcs of chocolate (my supervisor gave us w/ chocolate covered macadamia nuts)
1/2 serving of chocolate cake (today was Fred's 56th birthday)
2 servings of bread w/ my minestrone soup & plain salad (for Fred's b-day)
3-5 Rold's Gold Pretzel sticks
After work, I mentioned this strange symptom to my coworker who guessed that I might have heartburn or Acid Reflux -- and I think she's right. When I arrived home, I chewed 2 tablets of Tums and that burning feeling lingering in my chest area that I could be mistaking for hunger might actually be heartburn. Hmmmm.

Interesting.

Yum Yum

I'm starting to get my appetite back again, kinda. I'm able to eat more foods that before and I don't feel like I have to vomit as much. Except for this morning b/c I had little to eat for breakfast and I wasn't able to eat for until 3 hours later b/c I had a long meeting to attend. It was pretty annoying. I was trying to concentrate in this important meeting and all I could think about was the nearest exit to vomit. The tougher trouble I had was that I work in a building area where a key is required to get into the bathrooms. So for me to vomit at my convenience was a fantasy. I'd have to find a key, wait for someone to get out of the bathroom or go to the bathroom downstairs or run to the nearest planter which is across the street next to a busy intersection. My work is not suitable for pregnant women. I also mentioned a few days ago that my office is right above this restaurant that cooks really smelly foods -- mainly gross smelling polish sausages and saurkraut. I used to love those foods before I got pregnant but I am so sick of it now.

Oh well.

WEIGHT: 153 LBS
BELLY-H: 36-1/2"
BELLY-V: 12-3/4"
WAIST: 32"
BOOBS-H: 37"
BOOBS-V: 13-1/4"